The ‘beloved’

Let me start from the end. You are not dead. You live in me. You deposited a spark of immortal fire in me when you were my teacher in the late ‘80s. Like many of my classmates and colleagues before and after me, I wanted to be just like you – excellent in everything! Even your walk was a class act.

1990 – you came to Kaduna for a meeting. You visited the ABU Teaching Hospital Kaduna House Officers quarters to see how your student, now a House Officer was doing.

1993 – you were in Lagos and found time from your hectic schedule to see how your young doctor was doing and advised him to leave private practice and come into academics.

1994 – you opened the door for him to join the College of Health Sciences, Uniport as one of a new breed of Mediport Alumni being nurtured to become future lecturers and Honorary Consultants in the sub-specialties

1997 – you got British Chevening Scholarship forms and gave one of them to your young lecturer. That singular act has transformed my lineage FOREVER!

During the next decade, I was your guest at four major events in Port Harcourt – flight, accommodation, feeding, paid by you. You treated me as an expatriate over the years ensuring I had a hotel booked, airport pick-up and return; Mohammed was always at hand to take me everywhere. You would take the time to come to my hotel room when in Port Harcourt, just to confirm that I was comfortable. Once, you personally called Pabo Tailors and asked him to take my measurements and sew some big shirts for me. Mum treated us to sumptuous lunch every time I visited.

2011 – when I was unfortunately cash-strapped while doing a major home renovation, you gave invaluable support. The 17th Anniversary of our wedding was 11/11/11. You flew business class with Mum from Port Harcourt to Leeds, spent three days with us and flew right back to Port Harcourt! You had no other engagement.

You always honoured my invitation to Wakirike Unity Concert arriving dead on time, leaving me scratching my head as you waited patiently for others to arrive.

2018 -“How’s our wife? Tell her the bride price we paid is finished. We will come and pay more!” You came all the way from Nigeria to join us and celebrate Modupe’s 50th birthday and your speech on the day was (as always) awesome!

2020 – At my mum’s funeral you took the time and brought the Jeep to the mortuary at 7am so we could travel home comfortably. You later came to the village to join us to bid her farewell. You trusted me to manage your Online presence over the years giving me a rich opportunity to keep in touch with a lot of your activities. As you once confessed, you were busier in retirement than as a VC. How you enriched my thinking and my doing by assimilation. Your encouragement was legendary:

Bless you… You will go far… May your children do a thousand fold more for you… etc.

Lest I forget, I did pass on your message to Aches’, that the first salary belongs to Grandpa. The salary is ready. Where is Grandpa?

2021 – You always found time to join my Online Health Talks – my #1 Encourager. You believed in me all the way.

2022 – A (final) visit to Leeds and another trip to Thackray Medical Musuem

I am smiling here as I remember our endless conversations ranging from cowboys at all levels of governance, the absolute lack of functional institutions; to our serious exchange of ideas on making a difference in medical education, health and development, all the way to fits of laughter and the beautiful cheer of your voice, that one day good will overcome evil in Nigeria.

Thanks my teacher, mentor and father. The ladies send their love. I will press on and put to practice the ten lessons you taught me, primarily from your person-centred actions. There is one missing link so I have one parting wish – to honour the father God sent the way of a fatherless student way back in 1985: Can we (your Rivers people, colleagues, friends and mentees) establish a NIMI BRIGGS CENTRE FOR LEADERSHIP AND DEVELOPMENT in Port Harcourt?

Abiye Hector-Goma, a 1989 medical graduate of the College of Health Sciences, University of Port Harcourt, Nigeria, is currently a GP Partner in Leeds, UK